The Left One

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Sam + saving souls

I actually meant to make this a few weeks now since it just wouldn’t get out of my mind again. We all know that season 8 and 9 deal heavily with the topic of souls - much like season 6. So when I rewatched ‘Caged Heat’ the scenery in the first two gifs remembered me of a similar scene in ‘Taxi Driver’.

Rather dark scene, a woman imprisioned and Sam has her fate in his hands.

I’m not sure if the writers meant to parallel the scene but either way it says a lot about Sam’s growth. In 06x10 we have Sam, an absolute rational person who only cares about himself owing to the absence of his soul. He simply doesn’t care what happens to the djinn; on their way to eventually recover Sam’s soul and killing Crowley, she just might get in their way to achieve their goal.

In ‘Taxi Driver’ Sam is in hell, on his way to rescue Bobby’s soul when he’s approached by the soul of a dark haired girl who looks a lot like the djinn in 06x10. Sam, being disturbed and scared by those impressions of hell, doesn’t know how he could save her - in addition to his weakened conditions through the first trial - he has to leave her behind. Since 08x10 Sam and Dean only have each other again after they issue the ultimatum to cut the ties with Benny and Amelia. Especially after Sam started with the trials the brothers get dependent on each other again; Sam because of his worsening conditions and Dean because he still sees himself responsible for Sam’s well-being. The result is that he can’t save her alone. He’s not the one she waited for - not the one that could’ve saved her, not now anyway.

Then in ‘Mother’s Little Helper’, after Sam finally put Dean in his place by telling him that he has to stop making decisions for him which he’d never agree to, Sam is able to save these trapped souls all by himself. It’s not just that his body recovered from the trials by now, Sam is no longer under the impression that he can’t do anything without his brother watching over him, since a long time he is forced to do something alone and he is not only killing those demons, but he also manages to save those human souls - something they weren’t able to do in a long time. He finally accomplishes to free those souls.

So this is basically me trying to say that after his time of being soulless, having hallucinations and being dependent on his brother, Sam is finally at a point where he can make decisions for himself again and that he can be proud of himself.

Oh I like the idea of the Djinn, particularly because she was also the one who attacked Dean in Exile on Main Street, which would tie in wonderfully with the idea of Sam grabbing back control and saving souls. While she isn’t the same actress as the one in season 6, the visual certainly rings true. And thematically, djinns would fit perfectly here as they are warp reality and tying in with the whole book-not-matching-cover idea of season 9. Also, since we are getting a Sam with soul basically acting like soulless!Sam by all indications, this is a very interesting way of looking at it.

This is a really interesting take on the scene from Taxi Driver. Obviously, we all are really searching for an endgame where Sam and Dean take back control from the fate of the Universe and write a new script that leaves their souls and their humanity intact. I suppose when I look at this particular scene, I don’t see this girl as a Djinn. I see her as a child welcoming back her hero - welcoming back her father.

I believe Sam’s journey to saving the souls of the innocent is a part of his penance in his continued search for absolution for his sins. For the demonblood. For Lucifer. For being made unclean. The Trials, the souls - he is seeking forgiveness from his brother, from the world, and from a God that may or may not even exist and, most importantly, from himself.

I think this walk through the bowels of Hell in this episode was simultaneously a show of penance and a reminder that Sam’s existence is marked by Lucifer - the Father and the Savior of all the beasts and souls trapped in Hell. It’s a reminder that as much as Sam is good and as beautiful as his soul may be, there is still a darkness within that he allows to take control and stretch him to the limits of the line between humanity and depravity.

As much as Dean has to make the choice between permanently becoming lost to the wickedness of his demonic nature or recapturing the essence of his soul and embracing his fleeting humanity, Sam must also make the choice - to continue his own descent into Lucifer’s hellfire that still burns within him, or to wash it away with the shine of his soul and his faith in himself. 

I think we have to remember, though, that the girl in Hell was a few doors down from Bobby.  Now, I’m still partial to the idea that there are individual Hells that suit the soul, so that would mean that she’s actually there for Bobby.  Bobby’s cell is not locked.  He’s been keeping track of the time by scratching marks on the wall in his cell.  He appears to be in a big labyrinth of hallways filled with tortured souls begging for help.  So, even if he can get out of his cell, he can’t get out of Hell and he can’t help anyone else escape either.  Bobby’s whole mission later in life was helping other people, even if he couldn’t completely escape his own past torments, like killing his own wife.  So he goes back to his own cell and sits in there with the unlocked door because at least he’s away from all the other souls begging him for help.

So, I think the girl was actually a fake soul continuously asking Bobby for help.  When Sam walks by she just repeats her plea because she’s on a loop.  The question then, is just who does Sam think she thinks he is?  Is he saying “I’m not Lucifer” or is he saying “I’m not a hero who can save everyone…I’m just here for Bobby”?

That’s an incredibly interesting headcanon. But within the context of episode, the writing, the themes of the show, this was more about Sam’s perception of himself - his endless struggle to between being human and surviving. 

If the Dreaded Duo was really giving us some intricate, story-melded stuff like that, most of us wouldn’t hate them as much as we do. They tend to go with basic, and always revert back to whether Sam and Dean’s true nature is as heroes or as monsters. That has been their struggle from the inception. And it always will be, until they are able to make a choice. And even then, the Universe will always find a way to get its ending. 

Filed under very interesting! meta sam

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Inner Monologues: 8x14 & 8x21

“Dean, I get it. I know that you’re just trying to protect me. You’re my big brother, it’s who you are, it’s what you do. But you’re more than just my brother. You’re a hero, even if you can’t see all the good that you do, all the people you do save. You save all of the people you love in more ways than you know. You save us with forgiveness. I’m not clean, I’m not righteous, like you are. I broke the world, and I broke myself, and you’ve done everything you can to put it all back together. And thank you for that. But it’s okay now. I’ve found my path and I know what I have to do. Thank you for everything you’ve ever done for me, but I got this now.”

“Sammy, none of this is your fault. This crap was forced on you, on us, and I’ve tried. I’ve tried so hard not to let you down, not to let you fall, and it’s not enough. It’s never gonna be enough, and I’m tired, man. And I know you think I deserve some apple pie life, some big happy ending, but I don’t. That’s not what I want. My happy ending is right here, next to my brother, doing what we can to fix this godforsaken world. I would give anything to take away your hurt, to get you out of this, because that’s what I do – I take care of my little brother. I know you can do this on your own, because I do believe in you. You’ve become a better man than I’ll ever be and I am so proud of you. But don’t, don’t for a second think that I will let you carry this alone. You’re stuck with me. Til the end.”

Filed under brothers season 8

117 notes



In all seriousness 8.05 was actually ridiculous in the amount of foreshadowing. We’ve all discussed how Benny and Andrea were a parallel for Cas and Dean in the way that all the supernatural creature/human pairings were parallels. But there’s another layer to the parallel, now that we know about…

Hey lost-shoe, you were talking about beheading lately, right? Here’s some more of that since Andrea was beheaded and all…

Yes! I’d need to think back on both seasons 8 and 9 but there’s been several instances of Dean beheading characters who have been mirrors of his: Andrea as you highlight here but also Abaddon in As Time Goes By, in Bad Boys where visually Dean swiped at Timmy’s mother in such a way that was very reminiscent of a beheading action, and then also in The Purge where killing Alonso wasn’t quite beheading but to me was very suggestive of it. All of these instances to me hint that Dean must play a very important role in defeating both the literal monster he has become while also overcoming the figurative monsters that plague him and shape his self-perceptions and drive his codependency. Which is exactly how it needs to happen, because yes Dean will need those he loves and who love him too to help him, but ultimately it needs to be Dean himself to recognise what the true monsters are and that the monster he isn’t deserves to be saved.

Filed under meta speculation dean demon!dean

1,006 notes



Never ending list of heartbreaking scenes  (9.12) 3/

So, what -- we're not family now?

You can see how much effort Sam needed to not break, he wants this over as well, he wants them to be brothers again. But he knows it will do no good, he knows they can’t just 'put a couple W's on the board and we get past all this’. Although he wishes they could. 

And Dean? He doesn’t know what’s right and what’s wrong anymore, he is lost, but he wants back, he wants his brother, and even though Sam isn’t offering him that, he takes what there is. He swallows his hopes and nods, because if this is what’s left, so he’ll have it. 

I always loved how this scene was left open to interpretation. To me it never read like the sentence finished as “… we cannot be brothers anymore.” though. It always seemed to me, as Yael says, that Sam realises it will never be truly right between them until Dean realises why Sam is so upset. That Sam intends this -like the kitchen convo- to be a wake-up call for Dean. And I fully sympathise with Sam’s intent here.

What I think he fails to realise in his very understandable anger is the extent of damage Kevin’s death did to Dean’s already ginormous failure complex. That he would not be jolted into realising how he took away Sam’s agency like Sam intends for him to, because in the tsunami of guilt washing over him, Dean would only ever interpret this as confirmation that he is unloved and unable to protect anyone.

What I loved about this season is how incredibly murky and human Sam and Dean’s choices were. Of course Dean wants to save his brother. Of course Sam wants to open his brother’s eyes. But their actions had devastating consequences for the other. Consequences neither of them ever wanted. ‘Cause no matter what, they love each other.

Also I love how the consequences were structured in terms of the usual supernatural alignment of their characters. Sam used to be the boy with the demon blood. The one with hell as a part of his being. Dean was the unwilling Vessel of angels. The one who would stop at nothing to save his brother from the clutches of hell. Season 9 flipped this around completely. Sam became the unwilling host of an angel and is now stopping at nothing to save his brother from the clutches of hell. Dean is now the one with hell as a part of his being. The boy with the demon soul.

I cannot wait for October to see how it continues.

Filed under very interesting! season 9 meta brothers